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The Colourful Language of Northern Ireland
Put-downs
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It is never a good thing to be too big for your boots - and the Ulsterman will always be happy to take you down a peg or two....

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"If you were well hefted you could piss round it."

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(This is typically remarked if somebody is boasting about the size of their farm.)

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"Thon one has a china ass."

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(A comment made about a pretentious lady - implying she is much too nice to possess a normal one like the rest of us.)

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"You're as useless as an ashtray on a motorbike."

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"The style is crushing - and poverty's pushing."

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"You're talkin' like a ha'penny book with the back off it."

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"What sort of a powltice is that?"

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"You'll be some pup when your tail grows."

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"Ach, yer Granny was Doherty!"
(a comment used if someone is talking nonsense.)

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"You know what thought did.....He thought his ass was hanging out of bed and got out to put it in again."
(This is a retort to someone who makes an excuse beginning "I thought....")

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Or...... "You know what thought did - he planted a feather and thought it would grow a hen."

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"You'll be got dead in that oul' coat."
(A comment made to someone who has a very limited wardrobe.)

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"You're like a well upholstered sofa."

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"You weren't behind the door when they were giving out noses."

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"You're a crooked disciple."

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"The dead lice are drappin' aff him."